The story of the Rider and the Elephant goes something like this.
There once was a rider who wanted to ride the elephant and control him. The rider was smart and tried to use his cunning logic on the elephant to persuade him to listen to him as his rider. But the elephant could not understand a single word the rider said. He could however feel the rider’s motivation and it made the elephant angry and he refused to take even one step forward with the rider on his back.
So how does the story end? Does the rider eventually control the elephant with his great logic? Or does the elephant control the rider with his emotions?
The moral of this story: No stream of logic will EVER trump how we feel about something or someone. Human nature has proven it time and time again with both good and evil. The elephant inside of us always wins.
How to train your Elephant to accept your Rider and what to expect.
Training an elephant is about the same as training a pet.
Pets need clear simple instruction or challenges, delivered with consistency and loving kindness to learn the lesson(s) that you want to teach them.
Pets can’t see what they need to learn. That’s why they have someone to train them.
Repetition and consistency are key to learning.
You can’t try and control how long it takes for your pet to learn the lesson. Every pet learns differently and at different speeds.
When pets resist learning what happens? A new approach is taken for a controlled period of time and then if that does not work changed. However, chances are great the second time will work if not the first.
Have empathy for your pet and trust that it will and wants to learn. Assume if it’s not learning that you have not mastered thinking from your pet’s point of view.
When your pet learns the lesson you patiently took the time to teach, both of you will see your self-esteem rise.
Elephant training is best done in groups.
How to Establishing a Great Working Herd.
Look at this chart below and see if you each can figure out how to identify how everyone in your group learns best.
Step 1: Take a guess at how you think each person in your group would learn best.
Step 2: Get together as soon as possible to state how you learn best and compare it against how others perceived you might learn best. Find a way to have everyone together even if you phone or skype someone into the room with the rest of you.
During your time together as a group I would:
- Set ground rules about how your group will function and how you will capture the details of your goals and progress.
- Set ground rules about your interpersonal dynamics.
a) How will everyone be heard? What are the rules to make sure this happens? How can communication flow fluidly between us and what will we do it fails to lift off altogether or breaks? How will we fix it/ repair it?
b) What happens if my feelings are hurt? How will I communicate it respectfully and forgive or be the one to be forgiven so that I can continue to “receive elephant pet training” from anyone in the group.
c) REPEAT often. It’s easier and easier to talk about if you do. What am I learning about my elephant and its training? Every time you meet I would have this conversation.
When you master all 4 learning consideration (above) and can adjust your communication style to address each of the 4 different quadrants (below) you will have 2 more essential tools you need to launch your business and build your customer base easily. When the rider (the left side of our brain) knows how to train the elephant (the right side of our brain) we can develop our whole brain thinking and use it to lead others towards the development of their own.